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  Relationships

     
101 Steps To A Happy Relationship
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4 1. Listen to How You Talk
When working on your relationship, more than likely you and your mate have
settled into a pattern of speaking to each other. It might be with short, blunt
answers, heavy sighs as though bothered, or with negative remarks. Pay attention
to not only your words spoken, but also the tone in which they are spoken. Be
positive, cheery, and respond in a way that will confirm to your mate that you are
listening and truly interested – that you have time to listen and communicate. In
addition, add terms of endearment into your conversation. Instead of “Good
morning,” try, “Hi honey, good morning!”
4 2. Making Love
Intimacy is a huge part of a successful relationship. Choose a book from the
bookstore and try to bring a little excitement into your relationship. Do not be
afraid to experiment and learn new and exciting ways to please each other.
Keeping intimacy alive is healthy and not a bad thing whatsoever!
4 3. T urn the Computer Off
Often the computer becomes a replacement for a lack of something in the
relationship. It might be just surfing, playing games, or getting involved with
websites that promote pornography. If you notice that your mate is spending more
and more time on the computer, take this as a sign that even if not doing anything
wrong, they are choosing to spend the time with the computer instead of you. In
other words, use this as a sign that something is missing in your relationship. Start
by talking and searching to confirm what it is bothering your mate and then work
on making it better!
4 4. Follow Tradition
Keep some tradition in your marriage, which relates to the vows you took and the
fact that marriage is sacred. Treat each anniversary as a celebration of your love
and the time spent together. Follow the traditional anniversary gifts and see how
creative you can be. The first year anniversary gift is paper. One husband bought
his wife a beautiful Chinese drawing on rice paper, signed by the artist, and had it
framed for her. Make this fun, exciting, and keep traditions alive.
4 5. Control Your Anger
Every relationship has difficulties, and sometimes, there can be some intense
arguments. For the sake of your relationship and the love you have for your mate,
keep your anger in check. First, when people are angry, hurtful words fly, usually
not even meant. However, after spoken, it is too late to take them back – the
damage is done. Another problem with anger is that the word “divorce” can easily
be thrown around. You may not mean it, but you know it hurts, thus making you
the winner of the argument. NEVER talk about divorce in your relationship, even if
just teasing. If you need to go to another room to cool off, and then do that, but
whatever you do, do not allow your anger to take control of your relationship.
4 6. Financial Woes
One of the main reasons other than fidelity that marriages fall apart is due to
finances. When couples are struggling with money problems, tempers flare,
frustration builds, drinking may start, and it is an all-around unhealthy situation.
The minute there are any signs of financial difficulties, the two of you need to
immediately sit down and figure out a plan on how to deal with the problem. If
needed, go to see a financial consultant or a credit counseling service to help you
get back on track. Do not allow your finances to get out of line or your relationship
will certainly suffer.